Thus Faked Zarathustra

I have previously touched on the idea of self-contrived illness. It’s a very thin line to tread, especially given the wealth of information on the Internet. With the extreme price of health care, this is unfortunately an issue that physicians need to take seriously. On the other hand, missing a stroke or pulmonary embolus can have catastrophic results so all symptoms must be treated with the utmost of seriousness. Thin line, I tell ya. But I wanted to write this in a round about sort of way; starting w/ my high school philosophy class.

My personal fascination with Friedrich Nietzsche started in my angst-soaked teenage years, as it did for many people. My parents figured that these ideas were part of a phase. In college I was fortunate enough to study with Richard Schacht, one of the premier Nietzsche scholars in the world. That was 10 yrs ago and I still hold my copy of Thus Spoke Zarathustra very close to my heart. This isn’t a phase, Mom.

One of the many interesting things about Nietzsche, as is the case with many people, is the fashion of his death. There is sincere controversy surrounding the exact details, and given that the records are over 100 yrs old, reliable testimonials are difficult to find. Something that can be agreed upon:At the age of 44, Nietzsche started the beginning of what would be a complete mental break down. This mental and eventually physical decline spanned 11 years until his ultimate demise in 1900.

In a popular version of this mental collapse, Friedrich witnessed a horse being beaten by two cops in the streets of Turin and ran to the aid of the animal. He flung his arms around the creature and turned his head toward the sky, crying profusely. He was never the same after this single event. As an aside, Dostoyevsky’s main character in Crime and Punishment has a dream wherein a very similar exchange occurs. And Nietzsche was known to have been influenced by the great Russian’s work.

Anyway… Nietzsche’s madness rapidly progressed to the point where he was reduced to a shell of his former self. The formerly brilliant writer was nearly aphasic and could only form partial sentences. He was fed by hand like a baby. Some reports suggest he wasn’t able to retain fecal continence (IE:he crapped himself). The poor guy went on like this… FOR 11 YEARS.

Some critics have suggested that this display was all part of a clever rogue. As if it was all an experiment or joke that Nietzsche had designed from the beginning. Others speculate that the origin of his madness may have been anything from advanced neurosyphilis, encephalitis, frontal dementia, vascular compromise or even a brain tumor. He was only 55y/o when he died, so something was going on. In medicine clinical criteria are often implemented when no objective standard (a blood test or marker) is deemed adequate to establish a definitive diagnosis. I won’t claim to know what caused Nietzsche to fall into darkness for the final 11 yrs of his life. But if you’re shitting yourself, staring out into an empty room and being force fed pureed food by spoon from a relative for 11 years…. You’re not faking it. You have my vote.

On a lighter note, here’s a hilarious video of this faker who was being prosecuted in court. He decided to represent himself and it seems like his major strategy would be the classic “I’m having a heart attack” defense. After being checked out by medical personal and awoken magically with smelling salts, he was promptly sentenced to 42 yrs in jail. The video really speaks for itself, though: