To quote Dr. Rachel Herz, faculty at Brown: "The olfactory nerve synapses almost directly into the amygdala, in the limbic system, which is associated w/ memory and emotion”. Basically humans recall smells much better than sounds or images. Once I was in an elevator and someone walked in wearing the same perfume as my 1st legit girlfriend from high school. I instantly got a boner when memories of losing my virginity in her parent’s basement slammed into my brain like a bullet train. Then I realized it was a gray haired, 55y/o lady and used my backpack to cover my bulge.
On that theme, I thought I’d neglect the stream of negativity that runs in my brain like a plummeting stock ticker and describe some of my favorite smells. I bet you can’t read this list w/o smiling!
11. Pop
corn at the movie theaterI know that they piss and do all kinds of Tyler Durden-esque stuff to theater popcorn. You can’t say it doesn’t at least smell good, though.
10. Orgasms
Yes, they have a smell. At least they do if I’m involved. And no, this has nothing to do with anal.
9.Ne
w-baby scent
Not to be outdone by new-car and new-puppy smell, new-baby is the best!
w-baby scentNot to be outdone by new-car and new-puppy smell, new-baby is the best!
8.That one shop at the mall that only sells coffee
I’m not even a coffee drinker (unless it also contains Bailey’s or rum) but that store smelled awesome.
I’m not even a coffee drinker (unless it also contains Bailey’s or rum) but that store smelled awesome.
7.Cinn
abonHoly shit is this stuff good! I don’t want to hear about the calories, I’d just like the people at Yankee Candle to make one that smells like a Cinnabon. I’d buy one for each of my fat friends.
6.A stack of $100 bills resting on the phat ass of a Colombian Hooker
If you’ve never been there, you wouldn’t understand.
If you’ve never been there, you wouldn’t understand.
5.BBQin
g anythingNothing like the odor of grilled cow flesh. If you put it that way it doesn’t sound so appealing. But trust me, this is the shit.
4. Chocolate-chip cookies baking in
the ovenNo Oedipus complex here w/ my Mom making me cookies in a garter belt, but there’s something so sexy and beautiful about the aroma of chocolate. Scientists claim a link b/w dopamine release and the consumption of chocolate. Please refer to #10 above. My dick does the same thing, ladies.
3.Ne
wly cut grass
Reminds me of running through suburban Chicago as a kid. But I also remember that my asshole parents got divorced when I was 9 and had to cut 2 lawns sans pay because the $10 each wk surely would’ve sent the family to the poorhouse.
wly cut grassReminds me of running through suburban Chicago as a kid. But I also remember that my asshole parents got divorced when I was 9 and had to cut 2 lawns sans pay because the $10 each wk surely would’ve sent the family to the poorhouse.
2. Rain 
I don’t know if it’s ozone as a consequence of molecular ionization or the water acting as a filter to blunt the effects of pollutants… but it smells awesome after it rains. If I had 3 wishes from a Genie, one of them would be that all my farts smell like a good rain. Next I would drink a lot of milk.
I don’t know if it’s ozone as a consequence of molecular ionization or the water acting as a filter to blunt the effects of pollutants… but it smells awesome after it rains. If I had 3 wishes from a Genie, one of them would be that all my farts smell like a good rain. Next I would drink a lot of milk.
1
.My sweaty nutsackLove those humid, Chicago summers! Don’t knock it until you’ve tried it. And I recommend that you do.
Just to complete the circuit:
2 comments:
You forgot POO! When you're walking through the hospital and someone has taken a massive and especially nasty dump, and you think to yourself, man am I glad I don't have to clean up all that poo
I think you are confusing "good" with "absence of bad". If someone is constantly punching you in the balls and then stops you might think, "Awww, this is good." Bad the absence of bad is NOT the same as purely good... I still agree though, melena sucks ass.
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